Sunday, April 10, 2016

A goodbye note to my Father...

Sometimes you need a place that's different from Twitter and Facebook and blogs and emails. A place to capture your thoughts and fleeting fragments of memory, when the words don't exist and the ones that do have too much to say...

What are we without our memories? What is life at the end of the day but the thoughts and memories that come to us when all else is gone. Is it not the essence of being human, to have lived a life rich in memories and laughter and to not have just existed?

To see an illness rob a good man of his essence, of his memories, to leave him lost and lonely and scared. Aware and alive but walled off from the world, his loved ones, from himself. The progressive infantilisation and the crushing of the human spirit.

I remember who you were. I see it reflected in me. In who I am. 

I thank you. For every moment you shared with me. For every sacrifice you made for me. For the love and wisdom and kindness and understanding and compassion. For teaching me to be true to myself and not feel the need to conform to anyone else's idea of who I should be. For loving me unconditionally. I thank you for making me who I am. And I thank you for being you. 

I miss you.

And I love you.